Wonderfully Twisted Conversations
by D3W.Dropp
Summary: Welcome to our wonderful twisted world that we live in. We have transported ourselves into the very stories we love and in the process, molded Harry Potter and Twilight together! mainly for the hot guys but w/e . So read review and have fun!
1. Cellphones

Well. These are little conversations me and my friend Mistrus wrote. It is a small collection that contains humour, romance, love, and many other things. We totally got bored when we wrote these. So we hope you enjoy.

P.S. These are a cross over between Twilight and Harry rated M because we are paranoid.

Enjoy!

This one is about me and Mistrus had given Severus and Lucius cellphones and they discuss the random texta they get.

* * *

Conversation Between Lucius and Severus

LM: *sigh*

SS: Gah! What??

LM: I Miss Ashy

SS: Hmmm I wonder where they are hiding.

LM: I don't know, but this cute little thingy (cell phone) Ashy gave me says they will be back Later!

SS: You mean a Celly Phone or whatever they are called?? Vicky gave me one and showed me how to use it.

LM: Really?? *cell Phone vibrates* YAY message! *reads* AWWWW Ashy says that her and Vicky went to see the Cullen's! *growls* I don't like them!! Especially Emmett!!! He takes my Ashy Away!

SS: Is the boy that was fussing over Vicky with Draco a Cullen??? If so he Better not touchy MY Vicky!!!

LM: He is. *sigh* and that wolf Boy! Ashy says she snuggles with him when she's cold!! She rarely snuggles with ME!!!

SS: OH Suck it up Princess!!

LM: But I want to snuggle with Ashy!

SS: That boy better Keep his hands off or ill curse him!

LM: Curse Him?? If Emmett texts me one more time about Ashy's Boobs ill AVADA him!!

SS: HAHA Ash probably gave him your number deliberately AHAHAHA

LM: I know! She said we needed or have some more "manly bonding time" If I didn't love her so much I would curse her!

SS: MMMM as much as I would love to keep listening to you about Ashley I have thing to do. Good Evening Lucius.

* * *

Well this is one of many short or long conversations. As you can see we put their initials infront to make things simple.

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	2. Score And Vicky legs!

Two random conversations that I, Mistrus, wrote on 's legs. Now that was fun!

Enjoy!

Disclaimer- We do not own harry potter or twilight. This is stictly for our own amusement.

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Conversation Draco and Blaise (from Vicky's leg)

BZ: Hey Draco

DM: what Blaise

BZ: Do you think Ashy is HOTT??

DM: of course!! But so is Vicky!

BZ: Do you think Ashy like me??

DM: yah she said your hot!!

BZ: SCORE!!!

Conversation Draco, Blaise, and Harry (from Vicky's Leg)

HP: MMMMM Vicky Legs

DM: Back off Potter!!

HP: Why Ferret??

DM: Cause she's mine!!!

HP: what makes you think so??

DM: *points at back* that!

HP: ohh. Fine I get Ashley!!

BZ: WHOA Ashy's Mine!!

HP: I don't see any marks!

BZ: SHIT!! *marks Ashley's back* There!

HP: NO FAIRRR!!!!

BZ: GO back to weaselette

HP: *mutters* Fine steal all the hot girls I hate you!!

* * *


	3. Hott Girls

Teehee me and Mistrus put our selves at hogwarts. That was fun. Ron and Harry are poorly hitting on us.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer- Chapter 2

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Conversation between harry, Ron, Draco, Blaise, Ashley and Vicky

HP: Why do all the Slytherins get all the hot Girls?

RW: I dunno *stares at Ash* she`s sexxie

HP: I know! *points at Vicky* she is too!!

RW: Do you think their available?

HP: We could ask!

RW: Yes!! *walks over to Vicky* wanna go to Hogsmeade village with me?

VL: Ummmm... NOOO

HP: *taps ash on the shoulder* Hey you. Me. Hogsmeade village what you think??

AT: If that's your way of asking me out then NO.

DM: Shit Blaise!! * Watches Harry and Ron hit on Girls*

BZ: What Draco??

DM: Those two dork are hitting on our girls!

BZ: they wouldn't dare! Let's go! Ash Might hurt Potter!

DM: I don't even want to know what Vicky Would do to Weasel-bee.

BZ: Yah! But Ash must be getting creeped out by now! *walks towards the girls*

AT: no means no! I have Plans!!

HP: CHANGE THEM

AT: NO!!  
RW: Please??

VL: Piss off!!

RW: One Drink?

VL: NO!!!!!!!!!!

HP: Come On!

AT: sod off!

BZ: Hey potter, leave my girl alone!!

HP: Your girl? I don't see you mark on her!!

BZ: That's just stupid who marks their girlfriend??

DM: EH! Weasel-bee Piss off and Leave MY Vicky Be!!!!

RW: uhhh DAM FERRET!!

DM: what a comeback! You suck weasley

BZ: Piss off Potter! NOW!

HP: NOOO!

AT: Blaise sweetie I know you're trying to help but I'm a big girl let try!

BZ: Ok Love

HP: Hogsmeade village??

AT: NO!

HP: yes!

AT: NOOO!!!  
HP: YESSSS!!!!

VL: Drake get him to leave he's being Creepy!!!

DM: ok, Love

RW: uhhh, I don't like the sound of that!!

DM: Stupefy * Ron fly's backwards and runs off*

VL: Thanks, Hun!! *kisses him*

DM: MMM you taste good.

AT: NOO!!!

HP: YESS!!

AT: NOOO!!!!!!!!

BZ: I'm tired of this! Stupefy!! *Harry fly's backwards* there!! Stupid, Stubborn Boy! When Ashy says NO she means NO!!!

AT: Thanks Sweet cheeks *kisses him* No wonder I love you! Say have you seen Emmet and Lucius. For that matter what about Jake

VL: Yah! Where's Jasper? Snape? And the rest of them??

DM+BZ: UHHHHHH

** Noises from Cellar** HELP GET US OUT (rest of guys)

* * *


	4. The Kidnapping

Well this was a supah fun convo to write. We had to actually colour code the characters to keep them straight. Well this was our longest so far. so....

Enjoy!

Disclaimer- chapter 2

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Conversation Between Harry P, Ronald W, Blaise Z, Draco M, Ashley T, and Victoria L, Jasper H, Carlisle C, Jacob B, Edward C, Emmett C, Lucius M, Severus S.

DM: Hello, Blaise.

BZ: What, Mate?

DM: They think father is hot. Whats with that?

LM: Who thinks I'm hot?

BZ: Ummmm. Draco, i don't know but its kinky.

DM: Lol. Absolutely. Oh Vicky and Ash.

LM: Vicky and Ash? Who are they?

BZ: Just some girls. And lol Totally, Draco!

VL: We are not just some girls! Besides I would prefer a threesome between Drake and Blaise.

DM: o0o0o0o0o0o! I'm up for it! What about you Blaise?

JH: No! She's mine!

AT: No! Bad Vicky!

JB: Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!

AT: Not now Jake!

EC: ASHY!!!! *Grabs her*

BZ: Back off and put her down!! Who are you anyway?

LM: Yah. I am totally confused.

JB: Grrrrr! Hands off Emmett! Mine!

BZ: Yours? MINE!

LM: Can't you share?

VL: Actually, She's mine. Sorry boys.

DM: Awwwww! I want to be yours!

Ed: Go away mutt!

CC: Edward that's enough.

JH: Wait. Who are you people?

AT: Snape, Snape, Severus Snape, Dumbledore!!!

BZ: huh?

EC: Whaaaa?

LM: I have no clue.

BZ: Ashy?

AT: Snape, Snape... What is it Blaisey?

HP: Blaisey? Hahahahaha!

BZ: Beat it Potter!

LM: I am talking to myself aren't I?

RW: Yup.

LM: Piss off Weasley!

VL: Ashy that song is over.

DM: Its a song?

VL: Yes. No Lucy we are listening to you.

DM: hahah Lucy!

JH: Vicky, who are these people?

VL: o0o0o0o0o We have Blaise, Draco, Harry, Ron, you, Jacob, Eddie, Emmett, Lucius, and me and Ash.

DM: Wow that's a lot of people.

JH: Thanks Vicky.

VL: I know, and your welcome.

AT: *Jumps on Jake* I wuv you.

JB: *laughs* I wuv you too!

BZ: Oi! Mine!

EC: No... Mine! Jake leave her alone.

RW: *pulls out wand* Eat butter, Malfoy.

LM: *ducks* Hey! Watch it Weasley!

HP: *grabs Ashley and puts her in bag* Muahahahahahahahahahahahahah! *runs away*

RW: Ack! Harry! Don't leave me here! *follows the fleeing Potter*

JB: Argh! *shifts to wolf* Grrrrrrrrrrr! *chases Potter but gets lost*

LM: What the fuck is going on?

BZ: Oi! Potter! Put her down now! *pulls out wand*

VL: Ahhhhh! Ashy!! Carlisle Help! Severus help!

SS: Who are you?

CC: What do you need?

VL: I'm Vicky! And Everyone's stealing Ash. She's in the bag! HELP!!!!!!!!

SS: Why would I help?

CC: Sorry what?

VL: Cause Harry put Ash in a bag. Jacob has gone wolf, Blaise has his wand and I don't want MY Ashy hurt!!!!!

CC: Right.

SS: Right.

VL: Save her! *faints*

JH+DM: Vicky!!

DM: I got her!

JH: Put her on the couch!

AT: *muffled yelp* Get me out!

HP: Muahahahahahahahaha! Mine now!

BZ: I can`t! If I do I might hit Ashy!

EC: Don`t hurt her! Ashy Don`t let him touch your sexxie boobies!

BZ: What?! *turns on Emmett* Stay away from her!

EC: She`s mine! Piss off!

BZ: Mine!

EC: Mine!

BZ: mine!

EC: Mi-

AT: Get me out! NOW!!!!!!!!

LM: Fine! *sticks arm out and clotheslines Harry and Ron, knocking them out then picks Ashley up bridal style.* Such a cute girl. Hey Draco. She yours?

BZ+EC: MINE!!

AT: *glares at Emmet and Blaise and kisses Lucius* His!

DM: No, she`s Vicky`s but we can`t get Vicky up.

JH: Vicky, love. Wake up. She`s out.

CC: Slap her.

DM+JH: WHAT!!!

CC: If she`s passed out. Just slap her cheek, not very hard but it should wake her up.

DM: *lightly slaps Vicky's cheek* Wake up.

VL: *groans* Who hit me?

JH: Him.

DM: Me. The Doc person said so.

VL: Oh ok. I love you Draco and you too Jasper.

DM+JH: We love you too.

AT: I love you Lucius.

BZ: But we thought you loved us!

EC: Yah!

AT: Well! You two were too busy yelling at each other to save me. But Lucius did, so I love him now. *winks at Lucius*

LM: You flatter me. *Ash kisses him* Hey Snape I have a cute girl hanging on me. Beat that!

RW+HP: Uhhhhhhh.... *Lucius kicks them both*

EM: Awwwww. I`m sorry love!

BZ: Yah me too! Sorry!

AT: Sorry doesn`t make it better!

LM: Mmmmm. You smell good. Hahahah Snape! I win!

VL: Lucy! Bring me Ashy! I want Ashy!

DM: But what about me?

JH: And me!

VL: Severus bring me to Ashy? Please.

SS: Yes Mistress.

VL: hehehe Good boy!

SS: I have a sexxie woman in my arms! So I beat you!

JH: Hey! She`s mine!

DM: Is not!... Mine!

JH: Mine!

VL: Oh Stop!

AT: But Vicky! I want Lucy!

LM: Hmmmm, Hearing you say that really turns me on. *smirks* On second thought Snape. She is totally gorgeous.

AT: *giggles* Draco your dad is supah sexxie! *grabs Vicky`s hand* My peoples!!!!!

BZ+EC: Yay!!!

JH+DM+VL: YAY!

VL: Our Peoples!

* * *


	5. Boy Toys!

lol. Here's convo five. Hope you like.

Enjoy

Disclaimer- Chapter 2

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HP: Hey Ron! There's Ashley! Lets be total prats to her!

RW: Uhhhhhhhh….. Sounds good.

HP *sighs* Ron. You are an idiot. *runs and stops Ashley* Where's your prat of a boyfriend? Slytherin ain't he?

AT: Blaise may be a Slytherin but he's not a prat. Besides he's not my boyfriend. He's my boy toy.

RW+HP: Boy toy?

AT: Yes boy toy.

HP: What's that?

RW: How's it different from a boyfriend?

AT: *giggles* A boy toy is part of a bigger thing. Blaise is just one of a giant group of my boy toys. A boyfriend is for one boy only. I have several.

HP: So you're a…

RW: Slut?

AT: No! Heavens no! I just like my boys.

HP: But that still makes you a slut.

RW: Yah.

AT: No. It doesn't. It means I have several boys that I have equally. There is no whoring around.

HP: So that's why you refuse to date me.

AT: Got it in one! Good for you. Now if you will excuse me.

RW: *stops her* Wait one second. What about Vicky?

AT: Same goes for her.

BZ: Love? They bothering you?

AT: No Blaisey. They just had some questions.

BZ: About what?

AT: About boy toys and boyfriends.

BZ: Okay. *turns to Ron and Harry* you can leave now.

RW: Okay. *walks away*

HP: No. I want to be her boy toy.

VL: Sorry. Won't happen. She already has Emmett, Jacob, Lucius, and Blaise. No room.

HP: Lucius?

AT: Yah. Is there a problem?

HP: You mean Lucius _Malfoy_?

AT: Yes. That's the one. Sides Vicky has Severus.

HP: Severus!!!!

VL: Yes. No need to yell.

HP: But that's just wrong!

DM: What's wrong?

HP: The fact that Ashley is with Lucius and Vicky is with Severus.

DM: Yah I know!

HP: Doesn't… wait. You do?

DM: Yah! Having to share Vicky with any one is wrong!

VL" Hey! *lightly smacks Draco's arm*

BZ: Yah and Sharing Ashy. Is something I don't want to do, but she refuses to give up the rest of her boy toys.

AT: They are MY boy Toys Blaise. If I want to keep them then it's up to me... Not you!!!

HP: you two are Jealous that you have to share with Lucius and Snape??

DM+BZ: WEEEELLLLL

BZ: you see..

DM: Technically they aren't

BZ: with Snape and Lucius

DM: they are with all-

BZ: of us!!

VL+AT: good boys!!

HP: you guys are sick!!

VL: hey just because you and Weasley can't be a boy toy

AT: Doesn't mean you can be a prat about it!!

BZ+DM: YAHHHH

BZ: leave our girls alone!

DM: our girls??

BZ: yah,, you can share right??

DM: I guess so!!

BZ: Good Now!!!

DM+BZ: BEAT IT POTTER!!!!!!!!!!!!

AT: Awwwww love you boys!!

VL: me two!!!

AT: see Harry. Love isn't for just one person. You need to spread it out through lots of people!!!

VL: that's what makes all the difference!!

DM: that's what-

BZ: changes the world!!

HP: Yah I just feel the love!!*runs off with a horrified expression*

AT: Messing with Harry's mind?

DM+BZ+RW: CHECK!!!

BZ: what are you doing Weasley??

DM: yah??

RW: ummm… Hermione kicked my ass when I told her I wanted to be her Boy Toy. then Neville cured me and Harry knocked me over!!

ZT: WOW

VL: Bad day

RW: yah!!

DM: ok

BZ: soooooo

AT: we should go

VL: yaaahhhhhh

BZ+DM: Bye Weasley!!

VL: yah see you later

AT: adios *everyone runs away*

RW: sniffles* why does everyone hate me??

* * *

teehee review please.


	6. Draco's Egg!

Here's convo 6.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer- in chapter 2

* * *

VL: Draco baby? What are you doing? *stares at him*

DM: Laying an egg. *looks constipated*

BZ: WTF man?

DM: Snape said I could.

AT: Why?

VL: You can't lay eggs.

DM: But I want a mini Draco.

VL: Hahah, oh Draco. There is other ways for that, sweetie. *winks suggestively*

BZ+AT: *laughing their asses off*

DM: What did I miss?

AT: Nothing, Drake?

SS: Mr. Malfoy. What do you think you are doing?

DM: Laying and egg. For a mini Draco.

VL+AT: *starts giggling*

SS: Errr, What?

DM: Laying an egg.

SS: Why?

DM: To get a mini Draco.

SS: Again. Why?

DM: You said I could.

SS: No I did not.

DM: Oh then who did?

VL+BZ+AT: *can't stop laughing*

DM: Guys!

SS: It seems it was your friends

* * *

Review! Please and thank you! lol we have a ton more to put up too!


	7. Hypothetically Pregnant

lol Here's convo 6. Hope you like.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer- in chapter 2

* * *

VL: Okay you are probally wondering what we called you here for

DM: you could say that?

BZ: yah what's going on?

EC+JB+LM+SS+JH+CC: yah whets going on??

AT: okay this is a hypothetical situation!

VL: what would you do if we told you we where pregnant??

DM: I would be totally happy!

BZ: me two man!!

EC: oh yah!!

JB: totally

LM: lovely*eye roll*

SS: Great *looks at Lucius with wide eyed MOCK horror*

JH: really?

CC: awesome

AT: but what if we told you we didn't know who the father is? It could be anyone of in this room, hypothetically speaking of course

……..

VL: are they shell shocked??

AT: I dunno.. GUYS?? SWEETIES??

DM:what?

BZ: you got pregnant and it could be anyone

EC: This is just great!! Why do I get myself even mixed into these things

LM: well that is an interesting development. Right Snape?

SS: Yes, rather odd!

JH: I won't share!!  
CC: Are you positive??

VL: we are absolutely positive!!

AT: we have no clue, hypothetically speaking.

JB: we could wait and see. Then get a blood test!!

BZ: great idea!!

DM: way to think Black

LM: we could share!!

SS: I wouldn't mind.

LM: I mean we share Ashy and Vicky. Why can't we share the kids??

VL: what if hypothetically..

AT: We are going to have twins..

VL: triplets for Ashy, though hypothetically!!!

DM: WHAT!!!  
LM: well that leaves us with 5 kids and 8 possible fathers

SS: I like to share.

JB: that totally sucks

JH: don't say that Jake! You could be a father!!

JB: yay….

DM: we could share like dad said.

BZ: ya we could!

EC: *glares at Lucius* I don't want to share

DM: neither do I!!!!

BZ: same here!!!

AT: what is I told you the babies could be Potters or Weasleys??  
VL: in a hypothetical sense!!

DM: Get an abortion!!  
BZ: It could solve the whole problem

DM: all in favour??  
ALL THE BOYS: YESSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BZ: the yes's have it. Get an abortion!

AT: hypothetically Speaking

AT+VL: NO!!!!!!

DM: no to what?

VL: no to the abortion!  
AT: no to the Weasley and Potter!!

VL: No for my twins!!  
AT: No for my triplets!!

VL: no for not knowing the dad's!!

AT: and no for being Pregnant!!!

VL: we should run!! *looks around* we have about 3 seconds

AT: *grabs Vicky's hand* YESS!!! RUN!!!

VL: *screams and runs away* WE STILL LOVE YOU!!!!

AT: even though you hypothetically voted to kill our hypothetical babies!!

ALL THE BOYS: GIRLSSS!!!!!!!!!!

LM: knew it.

SS: Same. Did they??

LM: you know it. Besides the look on their faces!

SS: Priceless!!

LM: you know it.

SS: Should we help??

LM: I suppose so. But the boys wouldn't hurt then!!

SS: yah wrapped around their little fingers

LM: you know.. I think we are too!!

SS: * sigh* yah I guess

LM: They are Sweet , Sexxie, innocent women!

SS: Not so innocent, they would be great slytherins

LM: I know. Could you imagine the trouble they could cause!

SS: you know.. we could always give them a time out!!

LM: *smirks* That we could. Or for that matter a spanking!

SS: Kinky!!

LM: you can't tell me you haven't thought about it!!

SS: you are right, they do need a good spanking!!

LM: Shall we??

SS: Yes!! *both get up and join the Chase*

* * *

Teehee that one had laughing her arse off.


	8. Mummy

Here's convo 8.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer- in chapter 2

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VL: Ashy my love. How are you?

AT: Great Vicky, dearest. Have you seen Severus's wand?

VL: Yes!

AT: Where? Was it in his classroom.

VL: Nope! In his pants…. On the floor… by the bed…

AT: Well? Where was it? …… waittttt…. We aren't talking about the same wand! You're sick!

VL: Haha. I found Lucius's wand too. MMMM and yesterday I found Draco's…

AT: You stay away from Blaise's! I was only asking because Severus lost his. SO he asked me to find it for him….. Waittttt. He was _hitting_ on me!!!

VL: No duh. LOL

AT: Keep Snapey away from me! And stay away from my boys. I don't feel like sharing! Besides I feel like dumping a few of them. Their childish arguments are getting annoying.

VL: Hehe. Why would you want to get rid of a few and which ones? Besides Boy toys are _Fucking_ sweet!! I want my Draky. =(

AT: Screw your Draky! I want my Blaisey! And my Lucy! T_T I wouldn't mind Jakey either. I want to snuggle with at least one of them. Wait! Now I want Emmy-poo!. No I want all my boys. Not dropping any!!!!

VL: My Draco Rocks the world! Your so jealous of my Draco. Bitch. Hahahaha you gryffindork. You wanna snuggle? Go find Booby Boy!!!

AT: Ewwwwww! No I fucking hate Booby boy! I wish Kelton was here. He was comfy. I bet her would snuggle. And no I am not jealous of you and Draco. Your just upset because if I marry Lucius then Draco would be my son and by proxy you would be my daughter-in-law. I prefer you call me mummy.

VL: Go shove it up your ass "Mummy" o0o0o0o0 I walked in on Sev and Luc. Man that was hottt!

AT: Only you. Man you are bitchy, aren't you?

VL: Yup. Lol

AT: Hey Blaisy!

BZ: Hello love. I missed you!

AT: Snuggle with me!

BZ: Okay. *snuggles*

VL: Draky I wanna snuggle too!!!

DM: Yes darling. *snuggle*

VL: Yay!

DM: Love ya babe.

AT: MMMM Blaisy, you warm. *cuddles next to chest* You keep me toasty warm. Not like Jakey-poo, but close enough.

BZ: Can you not bring up the others when we are snuggling? It makes me feel weird.

AT: Why? Don't like to share?

BZ: Nope. I want you all to myself.

VL: Poor baby. Remember she's Dillion's too and firstly.

DM: So is my baby…. Why do I have to share?

VL: Cause I said so… and I love you all the same so don't try that, you love me more, shit.

DM: Yes "Mom"

VL: That better have been sarcastic.

DM: It was.

AT: Hey Draco. I could be your mommy!

BZ: *thinks for a second then laughs* Hey she could!

AT: You can call me mummy!

DM: No way!

VL: Nice Ashes. Really into the mummy thing, hey?

DM: Oh wow. Lol that's kinda sick.

AT: Oh piss off Malfoy! *storms off*

BZ: Dammit Draco! Ashy wait! *runs after Ash*

DM: Bye bye "Mummy" hahahahahaha

VL: Bye bye Ashy my love!

AT: Shut the fuck up Malfory!!

BZ: Ashy! Please! I hate seeing you like this!

AT: Bye Vicky dearest! Oh and go away Blaise.

BZ: Shit Malfoy! Do you always have to ruin moments? *leaves after Ash Apperates*

DM: Dam. Lol

VL: Oh good going, Drake.

DM: What?

VL: Piss off Ashes much?

DM: Didn't mean to. You mad?

VL: hehehe Never! Love ya.

DM: Yay! Love you too!

**In Malfoy manor**

AT: Lucy?

LM: Yes, sweetie?

AT: Draco was being a prat! I didn't want to be with Blaise. And Emmy and Jakey are gone for the week and I really missed you! *hugs*

LM: Its okay Darling. I'll talk to Draco. Until then. *pulls her to chair and sits down, pulling her into his lap.* Lets sit for a bit.

AT: Sounds good. *buries her face in the crook of his neck* You smell good. Like lemons and Evergreens. Very you.

LM: *laughs* Thanks. You smell good too. You smell like you though. Just you. Nothing else could have your scent.

VL: Ashy you there? *looking for Ash*

DM: Why would she be here? Its my manor.

VL: *eyeroll* Your father, love.

DM: Oh right.

VL: Lucius… Ashy. Hellooooooo.

AT: Groans* I don't want to talk to them right now. Vicky dearest I can live with but I am still mad at Draco!

LM: Okay, love. I'll talk to him.

AT: Don't be angry with him, Lucy. He was just being a boy.

LM: But I don't act like that.

AT: *giggles* That's because you, sir, are a man.

LM: Oh I see. *laughs

DM: Father, Ashley… Hello?

VL: o0o0o0 if Ash is hurt or missing I swear to god Malfoy I will hurt you!

DM: What! Why me?

VL: Because you, mister, are the one being mean to my Ashy… ASHY *yells again and hits Draco*

DM: Owww! What the fuck?

VL: *hits him again* Find! *hit* my! *hit* Ashy! *hit* *hit*

DM: Ow! Father!... Ashley! Help!

LM: Should we help?

AT: Probably. *snuggles closer* But make him come here. You are too comfy. No moving.

LM: *kisses her forehead* No problem, love. DRACO!! We are in the library!

AT: MMMMM Thanks…. *wraps arm around his neck and kisses jaw*

LM: *smirks* Should we lock the door for a few minutes?

AT: *giggles* Nah. You can wait for a few minutes.

LM: So why did you come to me instead of the rest of your boy toys?

AT: *smiles brightly* I wanted my, Lucy. And this would be the last place some one would look for me.

LM: Aaaaah. I see. Well I'm glad you did. I missed you.

AT: Do you miss Cissy lots?

LM: *sigh* Sometimes but you chase the loneliness away. You are always happy and full of energy. The complete opposite of me and Cissy.

AT: I guess opposites attract. *nuzzles neck and gives it a nip*

LM: *chuckles* I guess they do. *kisses her softly*

VL: Draco. Find her!

**hears yell**

DM: I did.

VL: Cheater… lets go.

DM: Okay. Just, please don't hit me anymore.

VL: Maybe. Man how weird would it be if Ashy married Lucius?

DM: Gah! Weird! One of my best friends would be my step-mother!!!

VL: Hehe. It would only be that way for you… Me and everyone else would be safe.

DM: Unless I marry you. Hahaha then she would be your mother-in-law.

VL: Hmmm. I guess.

**Arrives at library**

LM: *Busy snogging Ash on the chair when he hears the door open* We have company.

AT: *pouts* We should have locked the door!

LM: I told you!

AT: *kisses* I know.

LM: Draco? Come here please.

AT: Go easy on him.

VL: Oh Ashy your okay! Oh you are _so_ lucky Drake!

DM: Yay! And yes I know.

VL: *runs over to Lucius and Ashy* Oh how are you? Drake can be such and asshole.

DM: Hey!!

VL: Oh shut up!.

DM: *grumbles*

AT: Buried face in Lucius's neck, nibbling slightly. He groans* Hey Vicky Dearest.

LM: So Draco. I heard you were being a prat to my Ashy.

VL: Hey! She's MY Ashy! And he was.

DM: Hey aren't you on my side!

VL: No!

DM: Oh. Why not?

VL: Cause I want Ashy to marry Lucy. Hehe. Then I can call him daddy *laughs*

DM: Oh sick.

VL: You know it!

DM: Evil woman.

VL: Shut up now. *gives Draco n evil glare* Or else.

DM: Yes ma'm. *looks slightly scared*

VL: *smiles* Good boy.

LM: You haven't told me what possessed you to be a prat to mine and Vicky's *gives Vicky a look that says, Happy now.* Ashy.

VL: No! She's only mine. *stomps her foot childishly*

DM: As was trying to get me to call her mummy… I told her that was sick and ya.

VL: But he said it meanly.

DM: *looks at Vicky* Would you stop? You're supposed to be on my side.

VL: Am not!

LM: Do you have a problem with Ashy being your mother? If that were to ever happen. It might or it might not.

AT: Oh Lucy. Please calm down. I was only doing it to bug him but I guess he took it the wrong way.

LM: Still. He shouldn't have been that rude. Well Draco?

DM: Evil Vicky!

VL: Hey what did I have to do with it?

DM: Being friends with a Gryffindor.

VL: Soooo. She's awesome and that house rivalry is stupid.

DM: Still.

LM: *is mad* DRACO!!! ANSWER ME GOD DAMMIT!

AT: Calm down Lucy! Please!

DM: I gave you an answer… Evil Vicky. I mean what kind of Slytherin is friends with a gryffindork?

VL: Me! That's who! *smacks him*

LM: What's wrong with Gryffindors? I am quite pleased with this one. *gives Ash a squeeze and she squeals*

AT: *giggles* Blaisey likes me. You're the weird one Draco.

DM: How I love a Slytherin and my Slytherin stayed in her house. Me, Severus, Blake and him. *points at Lucius*

VL: So I find only Slytherins to be my toys. Cept Lucy. I just think he's hot. LOL! I think boys from other houses are hot too!

AT: Piss off Draco! If you remember I was supposed to be a Slytherin but the sorting hat said I was too nice. So he stuck me in Gryffindor!

LM: Draco stop being a prat! Do you want to get grounded?

VL: Oh wow! You get grounded, Drake!

DM: *grumbles and turns around and stomps out of the library*

VL: Jeez. PMS-ing much?

LM: *laughs* Just like me when I was that age.

AT: But I bet you were cuter! *pokes his nose playfully* I prefer you to Draco though. You are Wayyyy sexier!

LM: *kisses Ash hard* Stop flattering me! *laughs and looks at Vicky* I think Draco needs to have you kiss his bruised ego better. Up for it?

VL: No! He was making fun of me!

AT: I guess he will have to suck it up. The big whiney baby. *evil smirk that looks a lot like a Malfoy one*

LM: *laughs loudly* There's that Slytherin showing! I knew you had some in you!

VL: Hehe.. She's really sneaky but only I knew that.

* * *

FINALLY UPDATED!!!


	9. Road Trip

Convo 12

Disclaimer- chapter 2

* * *

Coversation Between :: Victoria L, Ashley T, Jasper H, Emmet C, Jacob B, Carlisle C, Edward M and Bella C.

VL: Finally!

AT: We made it!

VL: Totally! That car ride was Killer!

AT: I know..Who knew Forks was so far?

VL: The boys better be gratefull!

AT: YA! I cant wait 2 see my boys!

VL: OH i know! i miss Carlisle and Jasper.

AT: Its stupid that jake lives so far from their place.

VL: I feel ya sister! well were here.

BC: *opens door* GAWD! its you 2! Fick cant you just go away? couple of gawd dam

home wreakers!

VL: whoa Isabella! language! oh and get over it!

BC: Get over it! dont you tell me 2 get over it! you tramps stole the Cullen men!

AT: GAWD! Esme and carlisle had driftes apart, and Alice and Rose had Left Jasper and

Emmett already!

BC: only cause you came along.

VL: NO! Alice left with Devin withers, Esme is happy with Charlie!, Rose was gone with Paul, Get over the fact that they came to us 2 fix their broken hearts!

BC: Thats not how it happened! you came and stole them...Eddie the Sluts are back!

AT: Sluts? Piss off Isabella before i hurt you!

BC: lets see you try!

At: theres worse things in this world then sparkling Vampires!

BC: haha no there isnt. we are the worst. being a vampire is the top! Nothing is

stronger!...Nothing is Faster!

VL: *smiles Evily* oh Really?

*Both girls temperaroly let their wovles take control* ( Amber Eyes, Long Teeth and claws)

AT: there are worse things around you.

EM: Hey Girls! Bella stop calling them Sluts!

BC: Did you kow they are WereWolves?

EM: Really? No wonder Jakes likes Ashley so much then!

VL: So can we come in?

EM: yes!

BC: no!

*Edward glares at Bella*

EM: Come In! Dont mind Bella.. Shes just cranky since Alice wont talk 2 her... something

about growing up...

AT: Oh no prob! are they here?

EM: they went hunting a few days ago will be home later today...

VL: do u mind if we crash here?

EM: *laughs* ya go ahead... Ash want me 2 call Jake?

BC: NO she has Emmett she doesdnt need my Jakey 2!

Em: Your Jakey *cold Stare* Bella I think you should go home... Ill talk to you later!

AT: Go ahead and call him.. I miss my space heater. Bliasey and Lucy just dont make the

cut in that department!

EM: I dont kow how you 2 do it.. managing guys a peice.

AT+VL: Four

VL: four a peice

EM:*laughs* you 2! please come in and sit down..

VL: mmmk

an hour later

JB: I got a call that my Ash was here! Is she?

AT: * jumps jacob* Jakey! I MIssed You!

Vl: arent they Cute Eddie?

EM: sickeningly

VL: *nudges Edward* Come ON!

EM: *sighs and laughs* Your right their adorable!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Later

CC: EDWARD WERE HOME!

JH: hey i smell something... and its familiar!

EC: Yah it smells human... Ashley!

CC+JH: VICKY!

AT+VL: hey boys!

VL; how was the trip?

JH: good. Found enough to eat

CC: ya and Emmett only hurt himself Twice *smiles and Laughs*

AT: OH my poor baby! *hugs Emmett*

EC: ya i tripped off a cliff. but i still mantain that Jasper pussed me!

JH: did not! you just happened 2 bounce off my hands *smiles evily*

AT: Jasper you better not have hurt one of my boys...

VL: Easy Ash Jasper... Carlisle i missed yous guys so mcuh! *kisses them both*

CC: wasnt Bella here? *Ash and Vicky Glare* *carlisle sighs* what happened?

EM: Bella was being Bella *sighs and stands up*

AT: Bella was being a Bitch!

JB: Ashley thats not nice!

VL: who cares its true she was down right rude!

JH: i know she must have been in a bad mood..

AT: NO KIDDING!

EM: well Bella is waiting at home... so Ill see you guys later.

JH+JB: See ya later

CC+AT+VL: Bye Edward

EC: Piece out Eddie!

AT: *hugs Jake and Emmett* come on you 2 i want 2 snuggle!

JB: sounds good.

EC: im down with that! *Ashey pulls them upstairs*

VL: Letts cuddle on the couch while you tell me all about your trip.

JH: Good.. it was perfect. nice and relaxing.

CC: yah.


	10. Male Bonding Pt 1

Here's Convo 9

Disclaimer- chapter 2

* * *

Conversation Between: Lucius M and Emmett C. (text Messages)

haha i have Ashy 2 myself!

*EmmyBear*

stop texting me!

-Lucy-

Ashy says we need 2 bond... soooo lets bond! =)

*EmmyBear*

No im not gonna listen 2 you. and stop texting me about my Ashes Boobs!

-Lucy-

what they are nice boobs.

*EmmyBear*

NO! NO MORE!

-Lucy-

lol i is curled up with Ashy but Jake is here =(

*EmmyBear*

that has 2 suck... i always get Ashy 2 myself Bliase respects out time. =p

-Lucy-

Dude! that sucks Jake is always here when Ash shows up..

*EmmyBear*

lol thats funnie cause you guys are tempature opposites. lol Hot n cold.

-Lucy-

oh totally. but Ashley says it feels "cool"

*EmmyBear*

lol was that pun intended?

-Lucy-

most definatley YES!

*EmmyBear*

so hows she doing?

-Lucy-

oh great. we snuggles for a bit then played around the house and went for a walk.

she got tired and fell asleep so we put her 2 bed.

*EmmyBear*

oh. Let me guess you laying next 2 her texting me?

-Lucy-

U know me all 2 well.. Jakes here 2 but he fell asleep 2 lol

*EmmyBear*

lol no doubt she even runs me ragged!

-Lucy-

I know if i was human im pretty sure i would be dead lol shes everywhere.

*EmmyBear*

thats our little ball of energy.

-Lucy-

yah she is.

*EmmyBear*

totally... and were bonding...Great

-Lucy-

oh.. we are... well what can i say she brings out the best in us..

*EmmyBear*

that she does.

-Lucy-


	11. Male Bonding pt2

Convo 10 Everybody

Disclaimer- chapter 2

* * *

Conversation Between: Jasper H, Victoria L and Severus S. (TEXTS)

Hey Sevy poo! its Vicky!

~Jazz Man~

Hello My Dear.

*Sevy Poo*

Add this # !

~Jazz Man~

Why? I already have your # ?

*Sevy Poo*

Just do it mister!

~Jazz Man~

Yes Dear

*Sevy Poo*

Good boy

~Jazz Man~

might i ask whos # this is?

*Sevy Poo*

Jazzy Poos.. jeez Sev read the signature! lol =p

~Jazz Man~

No I will not save his #

*Sevy Poo*

Please! you guys need 2 bond! Ash has Em and Lucy Bonding!

~Jazz Man~

gah women why me?

*Sevy Poo*

because you love me ... Please?

~Jazz Man~

gah Fine women

*Sevy Poo*

yay! thank you Sweety! =D

~Jazz Man~

your Welcome i guess...

*Sevy Poo*

BYE?

~Jazz Man~

oh bye!

*Sevy Poo*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Later

erm Hello...

~Jazz Man~

Is this Vicky? or Jasper?

*Sevy Poo*

Jasper..

~Jazz Man~

oh.. why are you texting me?

*Sevy Poo*

cause Vicky is making me.. Sorry :(

~Jazz Man~

Oh do you know why?

*Sevy Poo*

something about Bonding...

~Jazz Man~

Sigh that women makes me crazy!... besides whats with you signature?

*Sevy Poo*

Vicky Decided I needed one and wont let me change it or get ride of it..

~Jazz Man~

lol ya no suprise there..

*Sevy Poo*

besides yours isnt any better! let me guess Vicky?

~Jazz Man~

lol ya...

*Sevy Poo*

Severus Snape U shut up!

~Jazz Man~

Sorry man. she stole my phone!

~Jazz Man~

Severus Snape and Jasper Whitlock if you dont stop dissig my Signatures youll both be in TROUBLE!

{~WolfWomen~}

yes love.

*Sevy Poo*

yes baby.

~Jazz Man~

Good Boys! =D

{~WolfWomen~}


	12. Scardy Snape

Disclaimer- chapter 2

* * *

Conversation Between:: Ashley T, Victoria L, Lucius M and Severus S.

VL: Sexxie Dahlins we have arrived!

SS: i can tell

AT: Ph dont be Sore Severus.

LM: Ash My dear ignore him..

AT: oh Lucius leave him be.. he doesnt know any betterits how he is daily...

LM: haha your right love.

SS: oh haha

AT+VL: *giggles*

SS: Its not funny.

VL: your right its hilarious babe.

LM: encredible.

AT: what?

LM: how they act together.

AT: Idiot!

SS: Lucius shut up.

VL: Severus behave... or else.

SS: You my dear are only half my size... what would you do?

AT+LM: uh oh!

VL: Severus snape beware *eyes become ember*

SS: why?

VL: you just angered a wolf.

SS: right.

VL: I swear to god *nails grow*

LM:Severus apologize before you die.

AT: oh Vicky just ignore him.

VL: I am I just wanted to scare him.

SS: ... Well you didnt!

VL: Sure thats why i can Smell your Fear.

AT: Oh shes right! MMMMM Delisious! *Drools*

VL: Yes SO Intoxicating.

AT: MMMM VERY!

SS: so ash is a wolf 2?

LM: apperently so..

AT: hmm i wonder what else is intoxicating sbout severus?

VL: hey back off! hes MINE!

AT: i know but still

VL: MINE

LM: ok ok girls calm down!

VL+AT: GRRRR

LM+SS: *backs away scard*


	13. Releasing the Hounds

Convo 11 =D ENJOY!

Disclaimer- chapter 2

* * *

Conversation Between:: Ashley T, Victoria L, Draco M, Bliase Z, Severus S and Lucius M.

AT: *sighs* This is Totally corny! i mean werewolves dont talk do that!

VL: YA! I mean we arent Blood thirsty monsters! Were... Nice

BZ:Really? why dont you show us?

DM: Yah! ive never seen your wolf.

LM: Hey Ash. Tell me again why im in love with a gryffindor werewolf?

AT: *giggles* Because im cute and sweet *pokes his nose playfully* and because im irresistible.

LM: *mock growls* your right

SS: Get a room.

VL: oh Sevy *kisses Sev* *draco and Blaise Groan*

LM: hmm Blaise and Draco are Right... I want 2 see your wolf

AT: i guess *sighs* vicky?

VL: ya come on you 2 * grabs Severus and Dracos Hands*

AT: Come on loves *lucius groans as Ash pulls him 2 his feet. Bliase just chuckle and kisses her cheeks.

* All walked out of Snape Manor*

VL:You guys are in for a treat.

At: only Jake has ever seen mine.

VL: ya Carlisle for me... he was curious..

BZ: Really?

DM: is that so?

VL: in a strickly medical Sense of course.

LM: OKay.. now lets see.

AT: *sighs* so impatient.. you ready Vicky?

VL: as ready as ill ever be.

SS: lets see it then.

*they start changing* * Ember eyes watch they boys closely*

*hands changed in 2 claws* * Skin shedds into Fur*

Soon 2 wolves stood in front of the shocked boys.. One wolf was pure white with a black spot over her one eye (Ashy) and the other black with a white spot over her eye(vicky)

LM: Sexxie

SS: yes! Very!

BZ: Hmmm.. Their cute

DM: Yes super Sexxie and super Awesome!

AT: *Snarls* VL: *laughs*

LM: Vicious 2! Huh loveÉ

AT+VL: *looks at them and Tilts heads*

LM: i relize now why your with me.. haha your unique

AT: *Wolfy Grin*

SS: It seems that they both survived. Vicky is the black one and Ashley is the white one.

AT: *growls and Turns back* Happy now?

BZ+LM+DM: YES!

VL: *gives an eyeroll* What o u think?

BZ: Sexxie

LM: conpletly Unique

AT: i love you both! You know that?

LM: yah

BZ: but its good 2 hear..

AT : *kisses their cheeks* THANX!

VL: Well?

SS: we love you 2 * eyes roll* you know that.

VL: ya but its good 2 hear.


	14. GirlTime

Disclaimer- chapter 2

* * *

Conversation Between Victoria L, Ashley T, Pansy P, Ginny W, Luna L,

VL: Ashy, Why do we have so many boy toys?

AT: Cause it's so fun!

VL: lol totally true!

PP: Well hello girly's!

AT+VL: Hey Pans

PP: Whatcha doing?

AT: Talking about our boy toys

PP: Oh fun! Lol

VL: It is

GW: Gah! Slut alerts!

PP: Piss off Weaslette

GW: Why would I?

AT: Cause if you don't we'll kick your stupid lil' blood traitor ass.

PP: What a poor child.

VL: Hahaha Literally!

PP: I know hey?

GW: Stupid bitches… I may be poor but at least I have class!

PP+VL+AT: Haha! You think you have class? That's so wrong! You're totally the broom of

Hogwarts.

VL: I mean the only boys you haven't fucked would be the ELITE Slytherins

GW: Haha ya right!

AT: Wow is that all you come up with? …Pathetic bitch.

*Three girls walk away laughing*

VL: Gah what a fucking idiot.

AT: I know… I mean. AHHHHHH! I have to share a HOUSE with her.

PP: I know you poor dahlin

VL: Let's go sit by the big tree!

PP: The one by the lake?

VL: Mmmmm ya.

AT: Sweet, let's go.

*Sits at tree*

PP: So, Hogsmeade this weekend.

VL: I know… we should go together.

AT: Absolutely

LL: Hello, Ashley, Vicky, and Pansy.

VL: Hello Luna.

AT: Hey Luu

PP: Hi Lovegood

LL: What are you three doing?

VL: Talking about Hogsmeade! You?

LL: Oh. I'm looking for Hagrid. He said he would tell me where this rare plant is!

AT: Oh what type?

LL: Grass.

PP: Huh?

LL: Limbus grass. It's very pretty and smells like flowers.

AT: Really.

VL: Kool.

* * *

REVIEW!


	15. Bumble Bee

Disclaimer- chapter 2

* * *

Conversation Between:: Ashley T, Jacob B

JB: Well, Bumblebee. We are here.

AT: AWWW! Jakey! You brought me to La Push! So What are we going to do?

JB: I think a picnic, then swimming, then you can sleep over. It's not often I get you to myself.

AT: Oh Jakey! If you were to ask I could make it so we could have some "Just Jacob and Ashley" Time. I'm sure Emmett wouldn't mind.

JB: Yes he would.

AT: Yah, but what I say goes.

JB: True enough.

AT: *Sigh* I know this whole relationship thing may seem weird to you.

JB: Just a bit. *raises eyebrow*

AT: Hush. But I just want you to know that even though I have four boys, that I can't possibly choose between any of you. I love you all very much. It would be like me asking me if you liked twinkies better than oreos . You love them both, I wouldn't make you choose.

JB: *Small smile and squeezes her hand gently* I would rather have one fourth of you, that none of you. And if you can love all of us, even when we are being doorknobs, then I think I can love you even though you have three others in your life.

AT: Awwww! Jakey, that's so sweet. I love each of you for little things. I don't love you because you have something the others don't. I love you because you are you. Not because you have something Emmett doesn't. I love this Jake. *Smiles at him* This will be a wonderful trip. I just know it.

JB: You are so sweet you may just give me cavities.

AT: *nudges* Well you so corny that… wait. I can't think of one.

JB: *Laughs* You are one of a kind, Ashy. One of a kind.

AT: So Are you! Out of all my boys you are different… well all of them are different but that's besides the point. But I love you.

JB: You are one in a million.

AT: Not one of a million?

JB: Never. You are my bumble bee.


End file.
